Back when I was on highschool, I really never thought that we will be moving away and have to find another school. I went on the same school from pre-school and during my first year in high school. Talk about getting that loyalty medal award on graduation. I could have those, but no. We moved to another place mid September of my second year in highschool. I told my friends about it and I totally forgot about their reactions. I had few friends, most of them is because we sat together. Either I’m the end or middle and we all had no choice but to stick together for the rest of the quarter.
Now, you might be wondering why I am telling you this. Okay, here it goes.
I was bullied. Twice.
I first experienced being bullied on my first school. Group of my classmates would always pick on me. Always, others come from the higher year. It was a classmate of my older sister. Have you ever tried walking in in school for one week wearing surgical mask? You are not contaminated with illness. I used the surgical mask to cover up the burnt in my lips and some in my nose. I burnt a helium balloon and effect was on me. My teachers that time would always tell me to remove the mask in the room since they knew what happened and just put it back when I am walking across the hallway.
The guy who teased me and the only guy who teased me about it was my eldest sister’s classmate. I saw him laugh at me at the end of the hallway. I saw him laugh across our room. I was young that time and really hurt my feelings. I didn’t knew there is someone out there who will laugh at you because you are somewhat incapable. I told my sister about her classmate. She defended me and that is the last time I was bullied from that guy. Other bullies where from our own room — my classmates. I had no defender but I have overcome it.
Like what I said, we have to move to another place. New school and new friends.
I don’t get a lot of friends. I am having a hard time finding friends. I am shy and don’t talk a lot. I was so lucky to even have someone on the first day on my new school. I met her when I enrolled at the school. She was my classmate then. I was bullied for two years — I don’t know maybe that was their initiation for new people in their class.
They would always pick on me. Hide my bags to the extent that I will really not see it. One thing that I hold on and saves me when they bully me is the fact that I live with my uncle and he is a policeman. Others will stop making fun of me because of that. Others still try to ruin my year. I had couple incidents where they would hide my purse and hang them on higer places. I had a defender — she was a friend. She would always stick beside me and defend me from them. That lasted for two years (mid Second year and Third year in highschool). I still get small amount of bullies on my last year in high school, but I could carry on. I mean, I had someone to defend me.
Now, you might wonder why I am sharing you this. I had an incident at work where this man accused me that I was laughing at him, that I laughed at him. My heart beat so fast, I was scared.
I will never make fun of anyone. I am not that kind of person who will laugh at someone. I wouldn’t. Because I know the feeling of being laughed at and I don’t want others to feel that I am picking on them. That I am making fun of them. It may sounded fake or too good to be true but I don’t do such things. I was once — no twice, have been bullied and I don’t want others to feel the same way I did. Especially when no one will defend you, but yourself.
This is the first time I wrote a rant on my blog — publicly. And I just want to let this pain and fire on my heart out.